Let’s review our physics ( it was one of my least favorite subjects in high school and college). Newton’s Third Law of Motion: For every force, there is an equal and opposite force. Hell yeah, my blog should be all about metaphysical. Well, when it comes to the principle of universe, I don’t fxxxing care as along as the example/method is universally applicable. If you try to push the wall really really hard (I know it looks idiotic), you can feel that the wall is “pushing rite back at ya”. Yeah, it’s like that…The harder you push, the stronger the feedback. So, if you are resisting something, it’s like pushing something away (resisting, not wanting it, pushing it away, got it?). You MUST SUFFER from a tremendous force that pushing you back. Will you feel comfortable of it? You can’t feel it? Go pushing the wall really hard now! When you push the wall, the force is bounced back to your physical being. Imagine that you have a huge resistance and the strong counter-force is acting on your dear heart. Oh my dear, now, I want to give you a hug if you have done so. See? Only by resisting less can allow you to live more peaceful, calmly, at ease, or whatever phrase you want to describe for a comfortable status in your daily life. Let me give another weird example…It has been said that the best Chinese Kung-fu master will never teach you how to counteract. The master will teach you how to re-direct the attack (force) or how to absorb it. It is believed that only through this way the attack will lead to minimum harm for the receiver. So, in conclusion, if you encounter something you resist soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo fxxxing much, try (I know it’s fxxxing hard) to have a different viewpoint to redirect your resistance or to accept the reality. It’s you who are feeling uncomfortable. No one can take that for you. Why do you want to torture yourself? Come on. It’s totally not worth it.
Why would I mention this? I had this classmate. She’s jobless and one day, her car just happened to be broken 100% in an instant dramatically. But, guess what? Within a week, she got a friend, who worked in a high-tech company and earned too much money, to just go ahead and buy her a $20,000 car. Amazing, right? Have you read the Secret? You attract whatever to you with your attention on, positive or negative. Now, if you can attract huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge disaster into your time, you have the equal opposite force, which should attract extreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeemely big positive thing into your life. You say, “I still don’t see the connection”. Ok, let’s talk about another law. It’s Murphy’s Law. Whatever you don’t want will just happen in a heart beat. It is because you put your attention too much on the things you don’t want. So, you attract this consequence. Your attention pulled it in. Darlings, if you have ability to create a disaster, you must have the equal force to create a heaven on earth. Focus your energy on the positive things only. Release your attention from that trap of negative creations. Jump out and start over!
OK, I started the (original) first line of this article a month ago but never had the intent to finish it. I feel I have had resistance on talking about this issue. Whatever…I just can’t sleep tonight and feel I really need to finish this one. So, here we go…
Tarot card…ok, people know that there are usually 78 cards in a deck. The first 22 is called the major arcana. And, the rest 56 is called minor arcana. I will only talk about the first 22 today. There are two major systems: Waite and Thoth. The sequences of cards are a little bit different. The first 22 of Waite system are #0 Fool, #1 Magician, #2 High Priestess, #3 Empress, #4 Emperor, #5 Hierophant, #6 Lovers (gosh, for a minute I forgot this one…anyone…I am resisting this at the moment), #7 Chariot, #8 Strength (Justice, in Thoth’s system), #9 Hermit, #10 Wheel of Fortune, #11 Justice (Strength for Thoth’s system), #12 the Hanged Man, #13 Death, #14 Temperance, #15 Devil (I stalled when I think of this one…gosh), #16 Tower, #17 Star, #18 the Moon, #19 Sun, #20 Judgment, and finally, #21 the World. These 22 cards represent the cycle of life experience. I will talk about it later on (probably in a youtube video). Anyway…In the Tarot card deck, #12 is the Hanged Man and #15 is the Devil’s card, again. The Hanged Man, eww… it sounded horrifying…nah…It’s Oden, an ancient god, hanged himself upside down to conduct a retreat for figuring out the eternity of life. Of course, usually, when you pick this card, it indicates (most of the cases) you create obstacles by yourself, or feel discouraged and not sure what to do next sometimes without noticing the causes. Ok, so the title of my article is “a child of the Hanged Man”. The Hanged Man here may not refer to a male figure. Gosh, it’s not very unclear how I would outline this topic…My bad…Let me back a little bit. Bear with me. In my belief system, a baby would be passed on some of his/her mother’s emotions, experience, and even karma during labor. As you know, a baby was connected to his/her mom in the uterus 24/7. Also, we all know, babies are very sensitive. They can be easily affected by moms. The bad thing is that (I was going to use tragedy but it was too strong) they don’t know they can decide not to be affected. They just accept any signals passed to them. Ok, so, the main focus of my article was to talk about why some kids felt so lack of love since a very very early age. If the baby’s mom is like the Hanged Man in the tarot card deck, it indicated she was not quite ready for this baby and even with doubt if she could first take care of herself. The stress and worries that mother has would be passed to the baby. The baby may not know why but he/she was indoctrinated that his/her birth was with all stress and worries. The mother may not even know she’s doing this. She’s so confused in life already. It has been proven in the western medical system that talking to the baby and letting the mom-to-be to remain a good mood with light music or delightful pictures can help the baby to have a better mental health. This works two ways. Bad mood can be passed to the baby, also. No doubt.
Now, Devil’s card. OMG…I mean…no no, it’s not that bad…I was overreacted. Well, it's was bad for me, originally. I will tell you why in a sec. If someone can be represented as the Devil’s card, it means this person jailed himself/herself in a certain situation. If it’s Waite’s Devil’s card, it indicates that this person trapper himself/herself in a relationship due to materialism or lust. He/she, unlike the person represented by the Hanged Man’s card, knows what he/she is doing at least deep down there. He or she may tell you that he/she “loves” his/her significant other. It’s so easy to feel there’s something wrong. This person, sometimes, is trying to persuade himself/herself (usually doing so by persuading others first all the time) that he/she has love toward the other person involved. Yeah yeah, he/she knows…This person just doesn’t have the courage to face his/her own fear behinds the desire of materials or lust and step out of it. Ok…so…if a mother is able to be represented as the Devil’s card, oh, God, it indicated the love of the child is rather small. She still has love for the child. It’s human nature. It's just a relative thing. I said "rather small".It’s a mother’s nature to protect the child no matter what. It’s love. No doubt…But, the amount of love is rather small to satisfy human needs of love. The child has not felt loved enough since the minute he/she was born. Again, the tragic thing is that he/she even couldn’t realize the source of feeling scarcity of love. Again, babies are sensitive. They can feel how their mothers feel.
Back to myself…I started this article a month ago because I suddenly realized the source of feeling lack of love in my life. My mom has been telling me that I would throw out every bit of feed I had since the minute I was born. OMG, why would a new born baby do such stupid thing to herself? It’s fxxxing stupid. You got to survive, girl! I said it now. I felt I really didn't wanna live then. Bad kid... Anyway, I survived. I grew up…just as a size of an elf…but, I am a cute elf. Anyway…I tried to look back upon the minute I was born and…oh yeah, there is one more thing…I have to mention that my mom was in labor for 14 hours when having me. I was such a bad baby! Bad bad bad...I didn’t even want to get born. After getting born, I just wanted to die. Gosh…again, bad bad baby!!! Now, after decades and a bunch of courses and training, I was able to go back in time to feel what it was like at that moment. I felt lack of love. Badly! I know the following things I am going to say would be full of judgment. But, I will just say them. When I first felt that span of time, I labeled my mom as a representation as the Devil’s card. It’s one HORRIBLE thing I can say about my mother. (that was also the thing about my reaction towards the Devil's card also) Yes, that was how I felt in the beginning. How should I continue now? Ok...I have to say that people do things for some reasons. These things may seem doubtful or unacceptable to others. But, let me tell you….and I say this to my friends all the time. A person will only make a decision which is doing the best to him or not bringing the worst to him in his interpretation at that moment. Once you understand the reason of fear behind that decision, you will find every human being just has a lovely but somehow confused soul (in my interpretation). Of course, it's always easier to say that to others than actually realizing it by myself. Forgiveness is never an easy issue. My parents met in a blind date arranged by the elders at that time. They were both at the age “suitable” for marriage. “Suitable” means you may already be too old to get married already, duh~ Yes, I felt my mom didn’t get married just purely because of love (again, it's my feeling and my opinion) and I still had not forgiven many things she has done in the past. That blinded me. Yeah, as I always say…besides myself, my mom has been my BIGGEST karma in my life. After dealing with my unfair filters two weeks after, I finally realized my mom was actually a Hanged Man at that time. All her life, she has been choosing to sacrifice her own dream for others. I felt her confusion and helplessness as being a mom during the carriage. Once I realized it’s her creation, I finally can step out of it and felt her fear. Now, I just want to say, “Mom, I still love you. Thank you...”
I edited the article once again and I deleted the orginal ending. I just haven't felt right about my post for the past few weeks...It's a hard issue for me...just hard...May all people on earth be loved...end here now...Gosh...
This month, I have been “forced” to deal with my past intensively. The first reason is that I took the Reiki class. After the 1st level of Reiki class, I have to experience a 21-day cleaning process. The process may bring out some past experience from the past. For me, oh boy, it was hell of a ride. The thing is, when you re-experience your past, do you have a different viewpoint now? Or, you are still stuck in the hatreds, anger, and all other negative emotions and torturing yourself for the second time? Another thing is that are you really having a new viewpoint or do you just tell yourself that you have a new viewpoint? I have heard too many people said the following:
“I thought I have forgiven him/her, but I didn’t.”
“I can understand why he/she did it. I will just let it go.”
“It’s in the past. I will move on.”
I have seen too many people that think they have let go but they still carry those burdens for the rest of their life. Why? It’s your brain that is tricking you. You think it’s reasonable to do so. Did you 100% feel that it’s the right way to do and you have determined to do it? It’s like the queen in Snow White. She kept asked the magic mirror if she’s the prettiest one among them all. If she believed she’s the prettiest one when the mirror said so, why would she keep asking? No, she’d never believed in it. She knew by heart she’s not the prettiest one. (I have to say this may not be the most clear example.) Ok, in other words, there’s something underneath your forgiveness or moving-on speech that reflects what you really feel. You may feel angry. You may feel sad. You may feel like a victim. You may feel like deserted. It that something to trigger that heartache when you see your ex mucking his/her significant other. You think you have let it go, but you haven’t. Not at all…Ok, so…What can we do? (I really want say Avatar mini courses are extremely effective but you will “think” I am just too fond of it. Try it once! Then, you can tell me if that’s the truth.) One simple method to help is to breathe diaphragmatically (conscious breathing/ belly breathing). Then, when you give the forgiveness speech, try to see if you feel really lighter after saying that. Or, you are still stuck in some negative emotions. It’s not a good sign. You should be able to feel delighted, light, or have that smile on your face unconsciously. It is because you really release the negative emotions/energy from your body. You are not withholding it anymore. It’s not like, “yeah, you are just saying it.” You said that about other people, right? “Yeah, he’s just saying it.” How about you? Are you just saying it? Do you really know it by heart? Feel it. Don’t think about it…Try it!
Law of Attraction is H.O.T. these days. Yeah, I believe in it, too. Anyway…I just read some terrible news online. It’s related to several deaths and I don’t wanna mention the content. The point is, “what attracts danger to you?” Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s you who attract the danger to you! I know, I know…You may be pissed by now and saying why you would attract danger to yourself. It doesn’t make sense, you may argue with me. No, gals and pals, your brain is not saying that you want danger, damage, or harm. It’s the fear generated from your heart to attract them. You have fear because you think the environment or the subjects are dangerous. Let me give you an example. How many of you have been to some National Parks with bear habitant? Ok, never mind. If you are a good boy or girl and visiting the visitor center upon arrival, you will be taught how to deal with these non-huggable creatures in real life. When you see a bear, first rule is that DON’T RUN. Please, please don’t make yourself look like a prey. What will make you look like a prey? No, no…it’s not your yummy look. It’s the fear of being eaten. Now, it’s starting to make sense, right? When you bump into the bear, you have to first remain calm. Yes, darling, you have to first remain calm. Animals have intents to hunt. Human beings are no exception. What would criminals to hunt for? Victims! What makes someone to look like a victim? Fear, duh~ You are afraid of being harmed. Yes, it’s the other side of the Law of Attraction that you wouldn’t want to pay attention to. Unfortunately, it’s there unless you overcome it. So, first thing to remember is to remain calm. How to do that? Well, if a deep breathe doesn’t help, try some quick affirmations. You have to read it like you really believe in it (if you are unable to manage that, please try mini course #6 Belief Management of Avatar. Google it!) Some examples are:
- I am courageous.
- I am always safe.
- I am calm and love myself.
Remember, only you can decide and create your life. It’s your responsibility, not others. Love yourself. May we have an enlightened planetary civilization soon.
Ok, every one in the US knows that Spring equals allergy season. Yeah, if you don’t know, the endless TV allergy med commercials would ensure you know that. I didn’t really pay attention to that since I don’t suffer from much allergy since Avatar courses. Yesterday, I was iming my dear girl friend and suddenly realized this may connect to group conscience again. Spring is the season of renewal and rebirth energy. No one on earth can avoid indulging in this energy. What happens if you resist it? You sneeze, you tear, and you cough. All physical conditions result from mental conditions. If you have a running nose, you just have some resistance. If you can’t stop your teary eyes, it indicates that you don’t want to face the reality that you are currently powerless to create your renewal in your time. Therefore, your body, which is reflecting the thoughts that you don’t want to face your hopeless life (in your own definition), starts some mechanism to blur your eyes so that you don’t have to see the world clearly. If you cough, as usual, you can’t say what you always want to say and you desire others’ attention on you. People, don’t blame the increasing pollen count in the air. Pollen carries a lot of rebirth and renewal energy. Of course, it is the key for the second generation. Let’s just sit down and try to relax. Stop saying that once Spring is over, the hay fever will disappear. It’s time for you to examine what you have desired to change. If you really can’t make a revolution, try first to appreciate what you have with some affirmations. You can find some good affirmations from Louise Hay’s cards and books. Read it until you believe in it. Remember, it’s your body. You are your body’s master. Only you can control it. Good luck!
When you know what you love, are you taking the things you like along the way to delay reaching the one? It’s a tough choice. It’s like I heard from one of the DVDs, either The Secret or You Can Heal Your Life. It’s a road in dark and you can only see the 20 meters with your light on (or eyes open). After you proceed another 20 meters, you can see the next 20 meters. You know where the road leads to based on previous information. The one is at the end of the road at least before. You do have doubt if the one is still there when you reach there. You would see so many beautiful creatures along the road to lure you (or at least you think they are luring you). You stop a little bit while and those creatures smile at you. Or, they follow you for a little while. Then, you doubt, “is it worth it to keep walking down the road in the dark? The one may not be there when you reach the end.” You look at those beautiful creatures, struggle, and feel exhausted walking for so long alone. Your mind tells you to stop and enjoy it, or you can’t tell if it’s your heart or your mind to tell you to enjoy it. Tears drop. You are not sure what to do. You feel something is not right. You are sad. People indoctrinate us to compromise. “You should choose who loves you more but not whom you love more,” said my many many many friends. It’s hard to aim for finishing that long and seemly endless road. Now, you are sad. You are afraid of getting nothing at the end. You wanna stop, following into the same old patterns you’ve been having. Life always gives you choices. It’s like an unbalanced if –then-else tree. If you go for the “then-else” branch, you will fall into that “then else” endless trail. Is it better than nothing if you find out the one has left when you reach the end of the road? You tell yourself that at least I visit so many branches and experience life. Is that real joy? Do you feel empty-hearted at night? People always make choices either providing them the best ever or the least worst ever. Your life; your choice. I used to have answers in every of my articles. I am sorry but I don’t have one single answer in this one so far because I just feel exhausted in the middle of the road. May everyone be truly happy in your life. That’s the only thing I can say now…Bye for now, my dear explores…May the love within be with you...
So, continue to talk about career decisions...Besides doing something that can make you have a smile on the face
and allow you to do it as smoothly as sliding on the ice, try to locate something that you can do it without brain
or something that you can't help seeing ideas pop-up about it all the time. And, that thing has to make you feel
fulfilled, with that smile again, of course, when it's accomplished. You shouldn't feel fulfilled because someone
compliments on your work afterwards. Your fulfillment should, I wanna say never but let's use a more gentle word,
N.O.T just depends on others' reaction. In the end, it should be you who's feeling your own feeling but not others'
feeling by the end of the day. If, just if, that job can make you pop-up ideas during sleep and you can't wait to jump out of bed to realize it, you definitely have to overcome all other obstacles to remain working in that job forever. It's simple. Do you want to work woth a job while yawning all day long or do you want to have a job making you feel energetic everyday? Again, it's obvious, isn't it? But let's face it, who can really go for it. I just faced the choice 4 weeks ago. Yes, a job I fall in love with but with low low pay. The other one is with a salary more that twice of the one I love. Trust me, I asked my tarot cards more than ten times. Well, in the end, my very good friend told me one thing, "follow your heart". You think that's easy? Giviing up a job with may get you close to 100 grand in total annually? Nah, it ain't easy. I chose the one I love. And, let me tell you. I know I won't regret. In the end, only the job you love can bring you more prosperity you can ever imagine. When you do something with heart, you can reach that ultimate success sky-rocking fast! This is not a 100% proper example but let me just mention this. In Japan, many restuarants only sell one kind of food. Just one kind! However, once you have it, you can tell how much effort they have put into that one kind of food. And, they may need to get up at 4am and work until late night. They just don't feel tired. Guess what? Everyday, people just line up to get that one kind of food for hours. Cause it's GOOD! I personally am not a fan of 18-hours work per day. I just believe doing somethiing you love should be something we are all after. That's it...(and I spent so many words on it...) May you all find THE job soon~
Yeah yeah…This sounds obvious. But, who can really say himself or herself achieve that? Raise your hand, please? I waist 7 years on something I don’t like. When you stuck in something you don’t like but you need to accomplish, you spend more energy to overcome your resistant everyday. Who can tell me he or she doesn’t feel tired after one day work? I don’t now! It is because I love my job. Ok, back to resistant…When you are spending energy to overcome your resistant, you stuck yourself in a bad mood at the same time. Who can tell me he or she doesn’t have any negative feelings when fighting with the bad mood while trying to concentrate on working? It’s also proven in physics. It’s called counter-force by our great Newton. If you apply a force on something, it will give you the same amount of feedback. So, imagine, if you are pushing something away (resisting something with your mental force), the same amount force will be hit back at you. Horrifying, eh?
I know, it’s not easy to find what you like to do. We have to consider reality. I spend 7 years to get a degree in the field that I am not interested in. Those 7 years were B.A.D. I could easily get raged. It affected all my relationships including my 8-year-long relationship with a lovely man. Yeah, we broke up right 1 month before my defense. B.A.D. So, you say that you like to design but it won’t feed you up. Let’s back for a little bit. Do you think you like to design or do you really feel you like to design? The thing you should be after is that something you can do with a natural smile and more smoothly than sliding on the ice. When you can do it with heart, you must be good at it. Find that something! It’s your life to live!
